In January I posted my mini New Year’s Resolutions, and I planned to update the first of February and revise as needed.
It’s not pretty.
Eating: I said I wanted my family to do 30 days of whole foods– Eight days of hospital living when the FYG broke her arm didn’t help us further this goal, and the fact that I was the only one on board with it and too stressed to be thinking well about cooking once we got home also didn’t help. It’s really a total bust.
Business: I also wanted to get two Kindle books ready for publishing. Again, the 8 days in the hospital and the complications of taking care of a girl in much pain, who couldn’t get to teh bathroom or shower by herself once we got home also rendered this goal unattainable. I have to confess that it also didn’t help that I had procrastinated too much in the first two weeks of January.
Reading and Spirituality: IN January, I want to try a plan to read through the Bible in a month, and read two books. I didn’t get through the Bible. Leviticus is where all good read through the Bible plans go to die. I didn’t read two books, but I did finish one- Speaker for the Dead: 2 (The Ender Quintet). I’m previewing them for my son. I have to say that I think if you’re a teen reading these books, you probably want to read the parallel books before you go on to the sequels. Ender’s Shadow: 1 (The Shadow Series) is the book I am reading now and want to finish this month, but, um, I misplaced it somewhere along the way.
Health: IN January I said “I want to work my way up to exercising just 20 minutes a day. I am in such sad shape. Carrying the laundry basket from my room to the laundry room gives me back spasms that have me doubled over in pain. A more doable goal is probably leave my room for more than half an hour a day, it’s just that bad. We’ll see.” I can’t say I exercised, but I left my room and my whole house for the entire 8 days our daughter was in the hospital. I stayed in the room with her 24 and 7. That was for several reasons- one, we didn’t have the time, free vehicles, or gas money to make the over an hour long round trip each day. Two- the weather would have made it impossible to come or go a couple of those days. Three: she was in an incredible amount of pain and often couldn’t sleep at all unless her father or I were there to rub her head and hold her hand. Four: This was a hospital where the oncall orthopedic specialist had refused to come in at all, the orthopedic office that finally agreed to accept her promised us were were getting one surgeon (this was the condition for us not leaving the hospital 24 hours after arrival), and then the day of the first scheduled surgery quietly tried to slip in a different surgeon (one we’d never seen or spoken to) without telling us- they just put the new name on the consent forms. We frankly did not trust them.
For the rest of February I expect to be too busy with our daughter’s physical therapy and basic care needs to make any reasonable goal in this area.
Cooking: In January I said I wanted to make four new Korean foods. Dokbokki; Kimchi; Cubed radish kimchi (http://www.maangchi.com/recipe/kkakdugi); beansprout banchan. I didn’t. Same reason as above. I did, however, make a different, laughably easy banchan- sesame broccoli. Yum.
Family: In January, I want to have 3 family game nights. Well, they weren’t exactly family game nights, but we did have a lot of games in January with the FYG- card games, mostly.
Organizing: In January, I wanted to declutter and reorganize the laundry room, and go through at least one book-case and get rid of some books As of February, I didn’t get this done, but I did make a surprising amount of progress, given the January we had. So I am good with continuing this in Febrary..
School for us, I said, ” is a given. There are some improvements that could be made, but it’s the one thing I’ve been keeping on top of to some degree. I plan to continue.” Humble pie. There was almost no school for most of January. Pain meds made it hard for our daughter to concentrate. My son has many gifts, character strengths, and talents but sticking to his school work diligently when I am not at home watching him like a hawk is not one of them.
Here’s a conversation my daughter and I had just today:
FYG: I’m reading about guilt. Do you feel guilty about anything?
Me: I am a mom. I feel guilty about everything. You are the macknae daughter. You feel guilty about nothing.
FYG: I have nothing to feel guilty about.
Me, pointing to her unread school books, a source of some head butting here today: You should feel guilty about not doing any school for the last two weeks.
FYG: I BROKE MY LEG!
Me: You read your schoolbooks with your leg?
FYG: Well. My leg *helps*.
I finally nagged her into actually reading some more schoolbooks. After about fifteen minutes of that, we had this conversation:
FYG: Nail break! I need to redo my nails.
Me: That’s all you do.
FYG: What else am I supposed to do with my leg like this?
Me: Um, SCHOOLWORK?
I wave the schoolbook in her face and tap her on the nose with it.
FYG: Is that a hint?
Me: No. It’s an order.
FYG: Doing my nails is also schoolwork, you know. It’s arts and crafts.
Me: Read. Your. Book.
It looks like my goals for January were a bust, doesn’t it? But I am okay with that. During the two or three short weeks required to be very hands on with my 17 year old daughter, we built some precious memories and an even closer relationship. I noticed the same for her and her siblings- already very, very close, they had further bonding opportunities once the FYG came home from the hospital. Because she needs help in the middle of the night the two older sisters still at home took turns sleeping with her at night in the downstairs guestroom, and her brother sleeps on the couch in case they need him. I do not love the pain she’s been in and I am not thrilled about the hard, painful work she has ahead of her as she begins physical therapy to regain the use of her leg and foot and as we fight the scarring condition she has. But I love the hearts for service I see in her extended family, and I love that she has seen and completely understands how very cherished she is.
So, here’s February’s Goals:
Maintain the warmth.
Get back on track with school.
Finish organizing my laundry room and going through the books in there, culling as I go.
Make cubed radish kimchi and dokbokki.
Read through the Old Testament
Read two other books (one of them being Ender’s Shadow)
Advance to level 18 in Spanish at Duolingo
Watch four sign language videos on Youtube to beef up my signing.
Clean my fridge (yeah, it’s so bad it needs to be a goal this month).
Finish up those two Kindle books for sale.
Take life as it comes in lieu of any of the above.