The DPG will be four years old on Sep. 19th. He is celebrating with his Aunt Pipsqueak on this Saturday the 14th, as her birthday is the 15th and when you’re part of a Clan, it is good to stream-line these events. (And for his birthday, he will receive Tracks, Scats and Signs (Take Along Guides) and The Equuschick is very excited to take him tracking in the woods. You should also ask The DHM about his very specific birthday list, and what she got him accordingly.)
He has had two opinions on turning four. The first is as follows: “First I was three! Then I will be four. After four, I will be FIVE!” This epiphany called for great rejoicing. His second opinion however, when asked how he felt about this upcoming birthday, was that he was sad to be turning four. “Why?”, The Equuschick asked. “Because,” he said most forlornly, “I want to sit on your lap.” Even for the stoic Equuschick, this almost called for a Kleenex and some chocolate. After the appropriate schmaltzy sounds and snuggling, The Equuschick cleared up this misapprehension about his fourth birthday and since then, he’s been quite looking forward to the whole thing.
The Dread Pirate Grasshopper also had a raisin up his nose this morning. He wandered nonchalantly into the DHM’s room and began to casually excavate those particular orifices. When rebuked by the DHM, he made his momentous announcement. He had to pick it, you see, because there was a raisin in it.
For a few moments the really disturbing thing was that no one could actually SEE this raisin in his nose, so it wasn’t clear if this was a cause for medical concern or if he was simply making up a story, as he is wont to do. (He has a story about a little brother, named Little Will. He and Little Will went hunting in Africa once and came back with a rhinoceros. There are actually many such stories, but this is the most famous.)
Fortunately Auntie Headgirl saved the day by instructing him to blow his nose and pretend to sneeze furiously, whereupon he did, whereupon the raisin flew out. Whereupon he was instructed to throw said item in the trash posthaste and NEVER to put an object in his nose again.
Mind, The Equuschick does not feel that only Busybrains are prone to these experiments of a nasal nature, but it did happen and it seemed blogworthy.
Speaking of stories. Yes, the Dread Pirate Grasshopper tells them. He has been telling them, in fact, since he was barely two years old, even though the Experts are Agreed that this isn’t supposed to start until around the age of 4.
The stories themselves are not at all problematic, but when he was two years old and telling lies it was a difficult thing to deal with. He was mentally mature enough to be able to tell an untruth, but not emotionally mature enough to know the difference between being disciplined for an offense and being disciplined for the lie. Tricksy.
If you’re struggling with this, the best way to deal with it is to do all in your power to prevent a lie in the first place. Do NOT ask straight-forward questions. When at all possible, “tomato-stake”. Keep the fictionalizing little Busybrain with you at all times so you can see what is and isn’t happening and you won’t have to ask.
Things in this area have gotten much better, but there are still moments of a deceptive nature.
For instance, it was so terribly funny in a criminal sort of way, yesterday The Equuschick found the Ladybug in the bathroom drinking a Pepsi that was found cleverly stashed in a vacant bathroom cabinet that was also housing approximately five or six empty candy wrappers and a carton of The Equuschick’s coffee creamer. SHE HAD BEEN LOOKING FOR THAT!
The darling little boot-leggers had stolen it, the DPG later admitted, a day or two ago and smuggled it to their little den.
The Equuschick can’t wait to visit her off-spring in jail when they’re all grown up. Well alright, she probably won’t have to. No doubt it will all have been beaten out of them by then.
Now then. This has come up in the comments once or twice, but the question remains: When you have a Busybrain, what is the reaction you get from other parents? Is it one of annoyance, curiosity, or a mixture of the above?
What about that question, “What do you do with them that makes them so smart?” This is a tricky one. In most cases, the people asking the question are already doing the best they can and children are different, and the best thing to say is “Thank-you! But they just came out that way.” And that much is definitely true.
But occasionally, one gets that sort of question from another sort of parent entirely and you want to say, “Look, yes, my child just came that way, but your child might stand a chance too if you actually read to them instead of putting them in front of the television, and fed them real food instead of junk food, and let them play outside and track dirt in the house instead of freaking out about the mess. And maybe you should take away the pacifier and let them make a bunch of noise, and maybe you should take away that ipad and give them some blocks.”
But you can’t say that, you know. So the best thing to do is still just smile and say “thank-you,” and the parents that really do want to do better for their children will eventually make themselves known.
If you are the parent of a Calmbrain, how do you feel when parents of Busybrain talk about their children? Do you feel that they come across as bragging about it?
This is indeed a tendency the parent of a Busybrain has to watch out for, but at the same time all parents want to share the triumphs of their children and it is a hard lot for parents of Busybrains when they can’t share these little triumphs without other parents feeling hurt.
Oooh, how about this one? This is not as applicable in a homeschool setting, but what about the occasions where your child either is in involved in some sort of program (age-segregated classes at Bible study, preschool, playdates, whatever…) or the adults in charge want them to be? When the adults in charge are so delighted with the Busybrains that they want to keep them in their class or group at all costs? “Oh it is so nice to have children who TALK! Please don’t take them away!” And the next thing you know, you are expected to share your child as an asset to the community, in much the same way you might be expected to bring a popular dish to a potluck.
How do you deal tactfully with this expectation? Do share.