The Dread Pirate Grasshopper Raises Questions of Theology

Playing in the kitchen, he asks, “Were cows on the ark?” The Equuschick, with her various trains of thought on washing the dishes, finishing the soup, and soothing the sick Ladybug, answers absently, “Yes dear, cows were on the ark.”

“Did Noah bring toilet paper onto the ark?”

The trains of thought all go SCREECHCRASH and skid to a terrible wreckage. “Um, what? HUH?” ….”Yes,. I’m sure Noah had everything he needed to use the bathroom on the ark.”

“Well,” said the Dread Pirate with cheerful confidence, “I think Noah brought toilet paper on the ark to blow the noses of the cows.”

All hope lost for her smoking trains of thought, The Equuscick picks up the Ladybug and they stagger weakly to the couch, to sip their soup and ponder these issues of deep doctrinal import.

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