What Girls Need to Know

What girls need to know

Physical intimacy is intoxicating like alcohol. It will cloud your judgment, inhibit critical thinking, and make you do things that later you may regret. And the consequences for girls are usually more devastating than for boys.
Physical intimacy carries profound emotional feelings with it for girls, but boys DO NOT feel this. They are more detached from emotions than you are.
Physical intimacy is exactly that- a physical thing for boys, and they will usually be embarrassed and uncomfortable and will leave once they have achieved their goal for physical contact with you- even if they think they won’t.
Boys have little problem being physically intimate with a girl and then forgetting about her and her feelings.
Boys attach little meaning to physical intimacy other than the physical pleasure of it.
Boys are very likely to see you simply as a physical object for their gratification. They will be generally clueless and careless about your feelings, although sometimes they will be able to convince you otherwise, because under the intoxicating effects of physical intimacy, they will be desperate to tell you what you want to hear.
Boys and girls usually don’t really have a true and clear sense of themselves in their teens. While still a teen you are more likely to misjudge the intentions of boys and what you really need or want.
Boys do not have the maturity to handle the consequences of physical intimacy. Wait until you are able to handle the intoxicating feelings of intimacy before getting into compromising situations (and of course, for us that means waiting for marriage).
Boys, even good ones whose judgment is clouded, will take advantage of you if you pass out at a party.
Boys will never care about you more just because you give them physical intimacy. They are more likely to stop thinking about you once you’ve given in.
There are plenty of boys, especially handsome and seemingly nice ones who will lie to you to gain your trust and your purity.
Older men can also be just like boys.
Girls do not always understand how intoxicating the mere thought of physical contact can be to a boy, and they think flirting is just fun. But be careful. Not only is this genuinely unkind to nice boys, but you will sooner or later run into one who will be insecure enough to get violent when you tease. You can provoke violence when you tease- this doesn’t make the violence ‘your fault’ but the fact that there are insecure boys out there does mean you want to be careful.
Violence and jealousy are not signs of how much a boy loves you. They are signs of how much he loves himself and how little he respects you.

 

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5 Comments

  1. Nellie
    Posted September 26, 2012 at 4:18 pm | Permalink

    “Boys attach little meaning to physical intimacy other than the physical pleasure of it. Boys are very likely to see you simply as a physical object for their gratification.”

    The whole post, but the above quote in particular, gave me this vibe: “Boys/men are insensitive, sex-crazed maniacs, and all they want is sex/physical intimacy, no strings attached.”

    I’m guessing you don’t think that, or you would be a hermit, not a wife. 😉 Was your point that boys, as opposed to men, are like this, because they are not yet mature enough to understand the implications of physical intimacy? Or did I misunderstand you entirely? Or something else?

    ~Nellie
    P.S. Longtime off-and-on reader here, but I don’t think I’ve ever commented before. 🙂

  2. Posted September 29, 2012 at 4:44 pm | Permalink

    I thought this whole post was important and astute. For years I have thought of empathy as analogous to color vision or a sense of taste, that it varies in considerable degree from individual to individual. Further, it varies within any individual over the lifespan and depending on circumstances. Hunger will turn Mother Teresa into a cannibal. I believe that the average girl is more emotionally mature (perceptive, empathetic) at 15 than the average male is at 30. I would conclude from this that boys especially will benefit from training in empathy. Just as everyday life offers many opportunities to practice reading (street signs, storefront advertisements), so everyday life offers opportunities to practice empathy: “How would you feel if someone did that to you?”

    Keep in mind, though, that sociopaths are not oblivious; master manipulators have to see what they manipulate.

  3. Left Right Out
    Posted September 30, 2012 at 8:32 pm | Permalink

    In the statment “Boys, even good ones whose judgment is clouded, will take advantage of you if you pass out at a party.” then what specifically is meant by “take advantage of” ? Because if it means “have s*x with someone while they are passed out” that would be more accurately stated as “rape” and if it means “grope and do other s*xual things to someone while they are passed out” that would be more accurately stated as assault. Saying “take advantage of” seems to lessens the crime.

    • Headmistress, zookeeper
      Posted October 4, 2012 at 1:27 am | Permalink

      First of all, that is a quote from Witnit, not my words.
      Secondly, “Judgment is clouded…” means both parties are drunk. Call it what you will, but I won’t blame one party more than the other for what happens because both of them drank so much they impaired their judgment and bad things happened.

      • Left Right Out
        Posted October 4, 2012 at 4:08 am | Permalink

        Sorry, I knew it was a quote I did not mean to imply those were your words.

        We are perhaps talkiing about two different situations. You seem to be thinking about someone who is drunk. When I read the list I took a girl being “passed out” to mean she is unconscious/insensible. Having s*x with someone who is unconcious/insensible is rape because someone who is unconcious cannot consent. Even if they are responsible for their own unconciousness, that should not be taken as implied consent.

        Has my original comment been clarified?

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